I’m forever banned from stepping foot on what is virtually 1/5th of Scotland’s landmass.
For those of you wondering, it involved my disgruntled ancestor, the modern day equivalent of a 5 dollar refund, angry townspeople, and a ban on my entire bloodline until the end of time.
I really want to hear this story
If this gets to a hundred notes, I’ll give you more details.
Alright, gather around. So way way back in the 1700′s, my respectable relative decided that they wanted to go traveling. Their crops had come in on time, they weren’t dying of tuberculosis, and, for once, the English weren’t trying to kill them. So, naturally, they ventured South to a small village in the Hebrides for a nice ‘tropical’ vacation. Upon reaching said village, they came across an inn.
Now, the Scottish, being the wild party animals that they are, were having a dance that night. This dance must have looked like a lot of fun, because my relative in question decided to pay a modest fee of what would be 5 dollars in today’s world to get in. Everything was going great, until 10 minutes later, the inn decided to close for the night. My dude was NOT having it. They demanded a refund, but the innkeeper said no.
Shenanigans promptly ensued. They wanted their 5 dollars, and by God, THEY WOULD GET IT. Unfortunately, there was a no refund policy. I don’t know what was worse, the fact that they were robbed of 5 bucks, or that they were thrown so violently off their groove. I will never know what really happened next that night that was so bad, so awful, so absolutely mortifying that it warranted exile, but one can’t help but imagine. Was it murder? Heresy? A combination of both?
In the end, the townspeople chased them off, banished them, and cursed their very name. If they, or any of their children, or their children’s children’s children decided to step foot back on that island, there would be goddamn hell to pay.
If I could choose to travel back in time to any one place, it would be this very same event. I mean, I have questions. Did my ancestor kick ass and take names, or did they get their ass kicked? What else would they do for 5 dollars? Was wreaking havoc on a small town and forever shaming the family name worth it? Was it honestly worth the 5 fricking dollars?
And this, kids, is why genealogy isn’t boring and you should totally go ask your Gramma for family stories right now.
This is literally one of my favorite vines, a masterpiece really and I will always reblog it and it’s just - I love so many just wonderful LOVING TOUCHES about it and it’s
The beautiful facial expressions and flawlessly communicative gestures the likes of which would be at home in my college-level dramatic arts classes
The universal relateability
The technical video and sound editing that’s DIRECTLY on the song beat, absolutely A+ timing and that shit is not easy to do
The amazing dramatic use of slow-motion that tells like - this is some Shakespearean drama story - conflict, BETRAYAL, this is Julias Caeser, this is The Iliad
The freaking teacher being in on it and being convinced to shake it down now
a game called “hamlet, kanye west, or dril” in which you are given a quote without context and subsequently must determine whether or not it originates from shakespeare’s extremely well-known tragedy hamlet, highly influential rapper/fashion mogul kanye west, or noted Weird Twitter account dril. it may sound easy but i have a feeling it’d be at least a little bit harder than it sounds
if you think this is easy, please remember drill said “I will face god and walk backwards into hell” Kanye West said “Nothing in life is promised except death” and Hamlet said “Words! Words. WORDS.”